Halachos of the 3 Weeks and 9 Days by Rabbi Pessin

Morai V’Rabbosai,

This evening is Rosh Chodesh Av, and that means as of Shkiya this evening (yes, it starts this evening, and not tomorrow morning) we transition from the somewhat limited restrictions of Avelus of the 3 weeks (for Ashkenazim) to the greater Aveilus restrictions of the 9 days!

Many Poskim such as the Aruch Hashulchan refer to this period  as an Aveilus Yeshana (Loosely defined, A national tragedy) as opposed to a personal loss which is referred to as a Aveilus Chadasha. As explained so beautifully by Rav Soloveichik in his Sefer Nefesh Ha’Rav, the two types of Aveilus are mirror images of each other, with the Aveilus Yeshana of this period (the entire 3 weeks from Yud Zayin b’Tamuz until midday Yud Av)) divided into 4 subset periods with increasingly severe Aveilus restrictions. First the days beginning with Yud zayin b’Tamuz, Second period, the 9 Days from Rosh Chdesh Av, The third period is known as Shavua Sheh Chal Bo (the week of Tisha’a Ba’Av) and the final period Tisha”a ba’Av itself which is the most severe (Post Tisha’a Ba”av until Chatzos on Yud Av the next day, the restrictions revert back from Tisha’a Ba’Av to the 9 Day status).

 I probably should have written this email at the beginning of the 3 weeks, nonetheless hopefully it’ll be useful for some beginning today. 

The following is a list of the restrictions which I have based primarily on the various questions that I have been asked over the years. It is in no way meant to be an exhaustive list of the Halachos.  As always, when I do these types of listings, it’s there as reminder, each situation is different, when in the slightest doubt please ask a Rav!

There is no such thing as a “Personal Minhag”! Just because you may have received a heter in the past to do something (such as shave) does not mean you have that Heter for life! Circumstances change and Piskei Halacha change with the circumstances- you must ask! 

  • During the 9 days one does not do laundry, exceptions exist for exigent  circumstances such as small babies, if you believe there may be exigent circumstances in your case ask! My father held that freshly washed clothing need NOT be tried on in advance of this evening! However, Freshly WASHED AND PRESSED (dry cleaners, Chinese laundry [if that still even exists] or washed and ironed clothing, newly acquired or never used before clothing, all require that you try them on (there is no amount of time required to wear them as a shiur, put them on close them and take them off) before 8:08pm this evening.
  • Sheitlach have a din of Beged- Clothing not hair, therefore washing cutting are Assur because laundry and tailoring of clothing is, setting alone could be Mutter.
  • Eating of meat and other flieshigs is only permitted on Shabbos, if Chv’sh you are ill, or for young children, ask shailos please. You can taste the food on Erev Shabbos for the purpose of making sure it’s good for Shabbos!
  • Even Sefardim do not make Chasunos during the 9 days because the Mechaber prohibits that based on a gemara in Yevamos. Although it is a source of halachic controversy, we generally do not play even recorded music during the 9 days. However, if the music is a background to exercise, or you need it to soothe anxiety or to drive safely or any other exigent circumstance, please ask a Rav!
  • We generally do not go swimming during the 9 days, again exigent circumstances exist, so please ask if there are cases such as health needs etc.
  • Please try and postpone any legal activity especially one in which a non jew is a party to the proceedings. Stay away wherever possible from dangerous and or adventurous situations during the 9 days. Again, where your options are limited ask a shaila.
  • On Motzaei Shabbos Chazon, Havdala is made with a “Chamar Medina ” other than wine or grape juice if possible. Please  have it prepared before Shabbos so you wont need to ask if you can use wine! Beer, Orange Juice (squeezed not diluted with water) Milk are all good examples of Chamar Medina .
  • On Tisha Ba’Av, Shailos regarding taking medicines with or without an accompanying drink, in fact, all medical situations should be discussed with a Rav, before Tisha’a Ba’Av.
  • Footwear should be of man-made material (yes, crocs , even if you wear them regularly are Mutter, we don’t make our own gezayros!)
  • After Chatzos on Tisha’a Ba”Av, although there is a reduction in the level of the Availus and we do allow sitting on normal seats, all the Chamayshes Enuyim are still in force! No eating, drinking wearing of leather shoes etc.
  • Motzaei Tisha’a Ba’Av as alluded to earlier, all the issurim of the 9 days eg. fleishigs, haircutting, music, laundry etc. remain in place until Chatzos the next day approximately 1pm

Iy’H, Kb’h will see how his people Klal Yisroel are  midakdek in his mitzvos and listen to Chazal, and Bezchus that, bezras Hashem , we will be Zocheh that Kb’h will turn our Aveilus to Yomtov and this year will be the last we will need to keep these halachos.

E. Pessin